Couples Therapy in Copenhagen

Yes. If you’re unable to motivate your partner to join therapy, you are welcome to come on your own. You deserve a better life, and that often begins with having a safe, confidential, and non-judgmental space where you can speak openly and reflect with someone.

Iakob Schjerbeck is experienced (born in 1963), has lived in several countries, and understands cultural differences, religions, and differing values. He speaks fluent English and French, as well as conversational Italian and German. He can also support you—by phone if needed—in finding a way to invite your partner into couples therapy.

The purpose of therapy is ultimately that you no longer need it. The earlier you begin, the fewer sessions are often required. It’s not uncommon for couples to stop after just 4–5 sessions and then return for a follow-up “relationship check” six months later.

That said, some therapists believe couples need years of therapy. Iakob Schjerbeck belongs more to the group of therapists who are a bit impatient and experimental in their approach—meaning you may be given exercises or reflections to work on between sessions.

It is never too late to explore what triggers you and your partner. Even if one or both of you feel deeply hurt, betrayed, or have lost hope, there is still something to gain from therapy.

Even couples who have filed for divorce, experienced infidelity, or feel they can no longer stand each other can benefit from the many tools that couples therapy offers.

Yes. In Denmark, Partelefonen offers free telephone-based couples therapy for up to 3 sessions of 45 minutes. This is rarely enough on its own, but it can be a valuable introduction to what couples therapy is—and perhaps help clarify what is going wrong in your relationship.

You may also receive a few practical tools to help prevent or de-escalate certain conflicts.

When a partner withdraws, it is often a sign that something feels difficult, overwhelming, or unsafe. Withdrawal can be a way of protecting oneself when it’s unclear how to handle what is happening internally.

This can create distance and leave the other person with questions, uncertainty, and a sense of abandonment. In couples therapy, we explore together what lies behind the withdrawal and work toward a safer and more connected way of being in contact, where both partners feel seen and understood.

Anger is rarely just anger. It often covers deeper feelings such as hurt, frustration, fear, or helplessness. When your partner becomes angry, it may be a sign that something important is not being met, understood, or acknowledged.

This can be difficult to navigate, especially if it happens repeatedly. In therapy, we work to understand what lies beneath the anger, so it can be met in a more caring and constructive way.

Condescending communication can be hurtful and damaging to a relationship. It can create distance and affect the sense of respect and safety between you. It often arises from frustration, helplessness, or when something important is not expressed directly.

In therapy, we work to make communication more clear, respectful, and honest, so you can speak with each other without causing harm.

Uncertainty about where the relationship is heading can feel heavy and unsettling. Thoughts of divorce may arise when something isn’t working or when the distance between you feels too great.

In couples therapy, we can explore what is really going on and bring more clarity to your situation. This allows you to make healthier decisions from a calmer and more conscious place.

Passive-aggressive behavior can be difficult to understand and navigate because it is often indirect and hidden. It can create confusion, frustration, and insecurity when it’s unclear what the other person truly feels or means.

In therapy, we work toward making communication more authentic, open, and clear. This helps you understand each other better, reduces misunderstandings, and prevents conflicts from becoming stuck or escalating.

When a relationship begins to drain your energy, it is often a sign that something is not working as it should. It may feel as though you are constantly giving without receiving enough in return.

In therapy, we can explore together what is causing the strain and work toward creating more balance, calm, and emotional energy within the relationship.

When a partner appears cold or harsh, it can be a way of protecting themselves. Beneath that surface, there are often emotions that are difficult to experience—for both of you.

This can create distance and make it hard to reach each other. In therapy, we work to understand what lies behind this “protector” or defense mechanism. Together, we find new ways back to warmth and connection.

Defense mechanisms such as fight, flight, and freeze responses do not arise without reason. We explore what triggers them, why they appear, and how more helpful and conscious responses can gradually be developed.

Feelings of humiliation can be deeply painful and affect both self-esteem and the sense of safety in a relationship. It can be very difficult to stay present if you feel talked down to or disrespected.

In therapy, all emotions are taken seriously. We work toward restoring respect, dignity, and a sense of safety between you.

Avoidant behavior can be a way of coping with difficult emotions (a flight response). When something feels too intense or overwhelming, it may feel easier to withdraw in order to protect oneself.

However, this can create distance and misunderstanding. In therapy, we work to create a space where it feels safer to stay in contact and remain present in the relationship.

Time-outs and time alone are valid needs—but they are often easier to respect when both partners know when connection (“time-in”) will return.